I was debating about when I would actually launch my new blog and what topic I would choose to write about for my inaugural piece. Well, I woke this morning and as I was perusing my social media, as I often do while laying in bed, I came across a post that just really burned my biscuits. Let me set the scene for you. A friend posted a photo taken from a page of a well-known entertainment magazine. The page was focused on, “Who wore it BETTER.” There was an image of two female actors wearing the same dress. The reader was to judge, basically, who looked better in the dress. I recall seeing this same type of article years prior in the same magazine and finding it foolish, but today it particularly agitated me to no avail. Why?
To be honest with you, I am over the comparison game. It is a type of competition we are placed in from birth. I do not feel it is only a female phenomenon, although, I do think females are often the primary target. From the time of adolescence I would constantly compare myself to images on TV, in magazines and movies. I grew up thinking my hips were too wide and my cheeks were too fat instead of just loving myself for how I was created. Little did I know that when it was time to birth my children, I would praise God for those larger hips and pelvis because it made for a very quick and easy delivery!
I think mental, emotional and social maturity along with age and experience has allowed me to grow and escape the comparison game, for the most part. I am human and still have some insecurities, but I have learned to identify them as insecurities and move on. I am more focused on maintaining my mental and physical health rather than keeping up on the latest fashion trends, or giving two hoots if my body type is appealing to others.
I come from a place where I had lost most of my finances during a down turn and it required me to rebuild. I battled cancer and the after-effects of the disease for over six years which resulted in an “imperfect body.” I had undergone many surgeries and reconstructions in addition to drugs that made my body ill and hurt. I cannot change my physical self to meet the “norms” because some of what has been identified as feminine features of a woman have been taken from me. This tragic event has allowed a beautiful side of me to blossom; an inward beauty and self discovery. It is a side not always seen, but understood by those who know me. It is a gift that has allowed me to look inward and love me and all my uniqueness and appreciate and love others for their secret gifts and uniqueness.
So as I have been completely honest with you today, I ask that you please try not to compare yourself to others. Embrace your gifts, embrace your beauty, and choose to love the person you were created to be.